In case you were wondering what to wear when one goes golfing, my answer is:
It takes a long time.
It’s generally played by rich, middle aged, white dudes who spend their golf games making business and political alliances that affect The Rest Of Us.
And while all that might be true, it’s also pretty fun.
Some things I discovered:
* You’ll be waaaaay better at golf if you, you know, pay attention. If you happen to do surprisingly well the first few holes that doesn’t mean you’re actually good or that you should stop aiming for the hole.
* ‘Par’ means how many times a good golfer would hit the ball to get it into the hole. So if a hole is ‘Par 3’ a good golfer could get from tee to hole in three strokes. My personal best for this Very First Game was four strokes. Worst? Ohheyletsstopcounting.
* Uh, did you know that some golf courses have separate tee areas for women?! That are easier?! RUDE.
* Golf carts are the most fun to drive. Particularly if you yell “Zeeeeewwwwm!” while doing so.
* These games are loooooong, dudes. Like, nine holes took us 3.5 hours. Granted, there were four of us and I spent a lot of time chopping my ball out of the weeds, but it was quite the time commitment.
Have you ever played golf? And if you have, how do I become less awful?
*it’s a really long list.