People Are Allowed To Disagree With Your Choices + You’re Allowed To Make Them Anyway

Are you an approval-chaser? Afraid of disapproval or worried about what people think? Read on for tips to stop being such a people pleaser. #selfhelp #selfdevelopment #peoplepleaser #motivation“Welp, I’m pretty sure I know how this is going to go,” I think grimly as I click the send button.

It’s mid-April and we’re in the midst of a pandemic, sweeping layoffs, and a gathering storm of anxiety.

I’m telling my email list about a live round of my beloved Bank Boost program, a five-week course that helps people earn more money, keep more money, and still enjoy their lives while doing it.

And I’m nauseous because selling people something – even a very reasonably-priced something that will help them mitigate their financial anxieties! – feels weird. At best.

I’m worried people will think I’m being opportunistic – even though I created Bank Boost years before this pandemic and this launch has been planned for months.

I’m worried people will think I’m charging too much – even though my colleagues change 2 – 5 times this for self-paced courses with zero support or accountability.

And you know? That is what some people thought.


Of course, a lot more people joyfully enrolled in Bank Boost, thanked me for offering such a helpful resource during this weird time, and appreciated the accessible price point.

But it’s soooo much easier to remember those few who disagreed with me + my choices.

The official term for this – our brain’s overemphasis on criticism and negative feedback – is negativity bias.

But even if you’ve never heard that term, I bet you’ve experienced your version of this – remembering that your cousin doesn’t like your cheesecake everyone else praises, obsessing over the fact that your neighbor rolled her eyes over your landscaping even if all your friends say it looks great.

I extremely get it! I’m right there with you! But the truth is: People are allowed to disagree with your choices + you're allowed to make them anyway. Share on X

Your mom is allowed to think you look better blonde and you’re allowed to let your natural color grow in.

Your best friend is allowed to think you should stay at your current job and you’re allowed to try your hand at full time freelancing.

Your partner is allowed to think you should finish your degree and you’re allowed to feel just fine being four credits short of a B.A. for the rest of your life.

Strangers on the internet are allowed to think you should do ___, charge ____, and wait till ___ to do it. You’re allowed to make a different choice.

If we wait for every person who’s ever existed to agree with our choices, we will never do anything.

If we wait for, like, FIVE people to agree with all our choices, we’ll still probably never do anything.

The people in our lives aren’t required to agree with every single thing we do. And we’re not required to wait for agreement and approval before taking action.

P.S. Need help with stuff like this when it comes to your business, your goals, your habits, or your money? I’m taking new coaching clients! Click here to learn more.

Photo by Isaiah Rustad on Unsplash

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2 Comments

  1. Charlotte McGhee

    I popped over to your site to link to your small city guides in a blog post I’m writing, and this post grabbed my attention- do all moms tell their daughters to wear their hair a different way? Prob. :/

  2. Alanna K

    Thank you for this post Sarah! 2020 was the year I decided to say “thank you for 40 years of advice everyone now I get to live my way!” And I made some moves – and have been incredibly happy ever since. I’m grown! Also, regardless of what economy we’re in you’re creating value for people, thank you for charging and showing us women how it’s done – lets close the wage gap. Love your blog and courses, keep it coming!

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