Spend your money, time, & energy on purpose.

How was your week, guys? I lunched with out-of-town friends, brunched with in-town friends, crossed ‘Go bird watching‘ off my New Things List and advised some very lovely people about increasing their newsletter open rates. As you read this, Kenny and I are in the midst of a long weekend in Decorah, Iowa which is adooooorable.

Links for you!

This week I was on the Jumpstart Your Joy podcast talking about doing things that come naturally, how I’ve grown my blog, and heaps of other things!

I’ve heard these are life phone-saving.

Welp, this is painfully accurate.

Adding this to my bucket list: Africa’s Most Luxurious Train.

Related: 9 train travel tips (which you can use on Amtrak which is a million times cheaper)

Fascinating! Have you heard of ‘temptation bundling‘? It’s a clever term for “combining a highly enjoyable, low beneficial activity with a less enjoyable, but highly beneficial activity.” Like watching your favorite tv show ONLY at the gym.

Ohhhhh! Such a good kitchen remodel!

And this will help if you’re planning a solo roadtrip.

Random product recommendation: I loooove Darn Tough Socks. They’re made in the US and last month I had a chance to take them up on that lifetime guarantee. I mailed off my socks with a hole and a week later, they mailed me a brand new pair, no questions asked. #customerforlyfe

I’m at least partially co-signed on this: It’s Insane That Anyone Goes Camping.
Camping gear — how much does that cost? A lot, it seems like. A tent. Sleeping bag. Whatever else you need, flashlights, etc. Batteries. Something to keep the food in so a BEAR doesn’t get it. A bear! Spending money to sleep outside where you have to protect your food from a bear. You know you already pay for an apartment?

Interesting and important: My Father Spent 30 Years In Prison. Now He’s Out.
I’d seen my dad approximately four times over 30 years, but I only remembered two of them: a visit when I was 12 years old, and one when I was 25. When I thought of visiting my father, I pictured the beige rooms, the beige uniforms, and how everything seemed to be nailed down. I always brought bags of change to use at the vending machines. I knew he had a sweet tooth, and I wanted to buy him something sweet. He always got reprimanded by guards for holding my hands too long.

Related: True Story: My father’s in prison for 16 years on child pornography charges.

THIS IS SO GOOD AND SO IMPORTANT. Advice to a woman whose friend hits women.
A) You don’t have to be “fair” when you choose your friends. Your opinion, your preferences, your subjective wants and needs are enough to say “I’d like to be friends with that person” or “I’m not interested in being friends with that person.”

B) Your opinion and your decisions about who to associate with don’t have the same burden of proof as a court of law. If people try to argue with you or challenge you to prove it (and nothing brings out the armchair experts on “fairness” and “burden of proof” and “we don’t know all the facts” apologists like a man accused of abusing a woman, so, be ready), remember this: You don’t have to prove your case, you only have to make your choice and stand by it. “I’m not a prosecutor and I don’t have to be. It’s come up enough that I believe it’s true, and I can decide not to be friends with someone anymore.”

If Seinfeld were set in the Midwest. (I think this is a bit idealized. There’d probably be a lot more passive aggressive comments about something being “interesting.”)

So sweet! Ways you can compliment little girls in your life that don’t include “you look so pretty!”

Hope you had a great week, guys!